This is what's so absolutely lovely about sobriety.
The hope and love that I learn in recovery, that somehow seemed to escape me when I was so lost in alcohol, is found again. It's in this hope that, God willing, we will do the work, or at the very least, be willing to try to do the work, so that we never have to drink again. We work toward a new way to manage our life, our feelings, our past, present and future. Scary stuff, but I promise you, if you do the work, whether with a sponsor, or therapist, or friend, you'll begin to see the sun...even when it's just barely peeking through the clouds.
Life without alcohol is a big step. Yay for you! But, life continues on. If you're like me, things won't magically be *poof!* kittens and marshmallows just because you decide to put the drink down. Go ahead, pat yourself on the back for about 3 seconds and then move on and get to work. You still have a lot to do and by the way, life is coming at you full throttle now and guess, what? You're gonna have to feel all of those feelings now that you used to try to drink away. Geesh.
So, hopefully, you've had at least a glimmer of sobriety. Just enough to show you that you can live differently. Just enough to give you hope. If you haven't seen or felt hope yet, hang in there, friend. Go to a 12-step meeting. There's always lots and lots of hope in the rooms. Hope to be hopeful! Will yourself to be willing! And, if you still don't believe it, then believe that I believe.